2018-12-20 - I miss my man

 

It’s the Holiday seasons and it is not an easy period for people being alone. I do some volunteer work helping with raising money and bringing joy to those who are lonely. In my new work, we are providing community support to seniors and we make lots of efforts in reducing loneliness and isolation for seniors living in the community.

 

This morning I feel lonely without my love Bruce. It’s been 18 days since I have not seen him and I will drive to him this Monday (in 3 days). I can’t wait. When you are alone, all kind of emotions come up and it sometimes make me sad or lonely. I know how important it is to be someone you love. When I am alone I keep myself busy with all kind of things (work, volunteer, reading, watching TV, movies, and other activities). I miss being with someone I love and trust. The last 6 months with my Man B were so good. Learning about him, about trusting, about surrendering. He is a great man with a good heart. He is intelligent and has a good life experience. I started a new work contract for 1 year. Some days, my heart would like to quit now and move to Toronto to be with him earlier. My heart and my head are telling em different things. I am turned between what my heart wishes and what my head tells me.

 

I started learning Korean and do about 1-hour lessons every evening. I enjoy doing it because I want to have some basic understanding of my love language. I also want to be close to him to provide him with support, sounding board and a loving presence. I will be in Toronto for the Holidays until January 2. And my biggest wishes for 2020 is to me with him more often and to move to Toronto at the end of the year.